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Natural Birth Compass Blog

What 99% of childbirth classes are getting wrong

06/25/2019

Natural Homebirth Tips, Childbirth Education

We have a global epidemic in the teaching and managing of childbirth, a focus on the wrong thing…birth itself.

 

You might be thinking, but isn't it all about birth, isn't that the point, I need to learn about birth in order to go through it.

 

But, in fact, birth is not the right focus for childbirth education, the focus should be on YOU.

 

Even though it is repeated everyday, all over the world, this mistake in teaching birth has been unintentionally, carried out by well meaning people who only want the best outcomes. Most importantly, this mistake could cost you a positive birth experience.

 

For example, think about your heart. You don't have to tell it when to beat, it just happens, you were born having a heart with the innate ability to pump without direction from your conscious thought, in fact most of us can't control our heartbeat if we wanted to. However, if you want it to keep pumping day after day, year after year, you do need to learn how to take care of yourself, how to feed yourself, how to stay hydrated. If you are doing these things, you shouldn't ever need to give your heart much thought.

 

So why do we get it so backward when it comes to birth? As childbirth educators and birth professionals, we think we have to arm expectant parents with information about the hormones of birth, stages of labor, all manner of comfort techniques, and every possible intervention that could arise, but what really happens when childbirth is taught this way is that  we lose sight of the center of the birth, of the pregnant mother, of YOU, the woman who will be going through an enormous transformation, even if this isn't your first birth. We tell you to "trust birth" or "trust your body", but we don't fulfill the promise of teaching you how to trust your body, we simply inform you of what will happen to your body and what to do to be as comfortable as possible.

 

This leaves you vulnerable if something in your birth doesn't go as expected, when something is "abnormal". Then, even worse, you risk losing trust in your body, birth didn't go how you were taught, so there must be something wrong with you.

 

When we put birth at the center of what we teach expectant parents about labor, we put the focus on what you are going through instead of who you are as you go through it. This means we focus on what is needed for birth, not the individual - not YOU.

If childbirth education starts with you, if you start by understanding who you are, how you live in the world, how you live life everyday, your struggles, your achievements, your strengths and your challenges, you will know so much more about how to prepare for your birth.

 

Are you a woman who perseveres regardless of the challenge?

 

Are you a woman who gives unconditionally?

 

Are you the nurturer, always tending to the needs of others?

 

Are you the problem solver, who can see solutions no one else sees?

 

Knowing who you are on this level will help you truly understand how to embrace your birth experience and take control of the process. Each woman carries a set of strengths and, in opposition to those strengths, a set of challenges. These strengths and challenges have been yours since you were born, and shaped by your life experiences, and they matter in your birth. Knowing about oxytocin doesn't help your labor, but knowing how to use your strengths and reframe when you hit a challenge will naturally help your oxytocin without you having to ever know what oxytocin is, like your heart beating and beating.

 

Your natural strengths will help you at every stage of labor, birth and parenting, while your challenges can hinder your progress. But, if you identify them before birth, they will help you more than you know, they will help you understand and face your fears and work through the difficult parts with confidence, in birth and for the rest of your life, especially as a parent.

 

Here is how it looks when we put YOU in the center of your childbirth education:

When viewed from this perspective, you are the center, your strengths and your challenges, your experience and the transformation that unfolds as a result of your birth. Your birth will not be like anyone else's - not like your mother's, or your sister's, or your best friend's birth, because each of you are unique. In the second ring is your birth partner, the person in your birth room who knows you best, who will be your support and who can best bring out your strengths and support your challenges. Only at the exterior do we have the birth team and the environment, these components that may seem important in the months and weeks leading up to birth, are trivial and changeable in a moment. But your birth experience will be with you, heart and mind, for the rest of your life.

 

Birth is hard and it will change you. It can leave you deflated, in shock, regretful, or it can leave you strong, in control and confident. I don't want you to be comfortable after taking a childbirth class, I want you to be strong, to be powerful, to transform into the empowered mother you are becoming so that you take charge of your birth.

 

Are you ready to take the first step to making your birth about you? Download your free copy of Three Sacred Cycles You Need to Know for a More Confident and Intuitive Birth, click here to get your copy now!

Listen to the Unschooled Homebirth Podcast for more about preparing for your Homebirth! 
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